Phragments from Phyllis: Is 'caticide' in my future?

As most of you know, I have a great love for my pets. And I generally have a particular affinity for cats.

I have had only two dogs in my life, and I'm pretty sure they both have thought that if only they were cats, their life would be marvelous.

So I'm having a problem with my current thoughts of "caticide." Liz's two cats, August and Alice, have been on an extended stay at our house, and now it looks like we will continue to have them for several more weeks.

Alice is a cute little thing who has discovered that, for the first time in her life, she can actually lord it over another feline. At her house, August is king and doesn't let her forget it. But at my house, Alice has learned to intimidate Emmi. And Alice has now found a new way to torment Emmi - and by default, the humans in the master bedroom. When Alice comes into our room, Emmi runs under the bed. So apparently Alice has determined that it would be fitting for her to use the space as her personal litter pan. I think this is directed as an insult to Emmi, but it is obvious who is suffering most here.

I have never before had a cat who did this. And, as with children of a certain age, the punishment must be swift and timely, or she has no idea why you are punishing her. The problem is, we haven't been able to catch Alice in the act. At her house the only time she's done this is when Liz or Vince has inadvertently locked her in their bedroom without a litter pan. (Vince has threatened to eliminate Alice on several occasions, but Liz and I have always defended her as first, not being too bright for a cat, and second, not at fault when she's been locked up all day without access to a potty.) But now, I'm beginning to think she's smarter than I gave her credit, because at first we thought it might be Emmi. - until we started consistently shut off Alice's access, and the behavior stopped.

Meanwhile, Cade has often ended up in our bed when he sleeps over - until lately, Then Sunday night he asked if he could sleep with us again, "since it doesn't stink anymore." Even the 4-year-old noticed.

So now I'm looking for advice. "Caticide" doesn't really seem like an option, and Alice is too old now to give back to her birth mother. So what can we do to convince her it's a bad idea? I'm living in fear she'll just move to another room.